"I want someone to love me for who I am." - One of the most heard phrases I heard spoken by single women, myself included. Because, let's be honest here, we all want someone who'd play well with our demons, someone who'd play the role of pure and bright light when surrounded by our darkness, someone who'd give and give, a never ending mine of sunshine. We women want - no, let me put it other way, we think and need to think that we deserve such a person after going through the hardships of being 12 months out of 12 "forever alone".
Well, let me tell you my conclusion after having a more than pleasant get-together with childhood friends: bullshit! And on a larger scale, I'd say we all say big fat lies to the others, ourselves included (well, at least I realized that's what I was doing all this time). We don't want someone who's quiet and soothes our forever bleeding wounds of past loneliness and bloody wars with persons we were too scared of leaving out of principle or out of fear of remaining just another face in the female population crowd that has been dumped/is still single. We don't wish for a man that would never ask who called or would take no interest in that next-door-looking guy that seemed to have his eyes linger on our bottom a second longer than necessary. We're incapable of imagining the rest our life next to someone who brings home puppies and books, does laundry and always remembers to put down the toilet seat. And we certainly won't get along with a man that knows when to remain silent or throw all of himself at our feet.
But then, what do we want?
Let me put this down, wait for it, wait for it... We women, no matter what men think, we're not complicate at all. Most of us want to be taken as deep and give off the wrong signals, when in fact we act on base instinct and, just like the big cats out in the savanna, we go for the big, fierce alpha-man. Money in both his pockets and bank? Sure. A shiny, flashy car, Italian branded that sounds like a purring cat? Nice. Sun-glasses like the stars from Hollywood? Not a must-to-have item, but if possessed brings a plus. Hair styled at a saloon? Mrrr! Facial hair tamed and trimmed perfectly? Double 'mrrrrrr'! But above all mentioned before, we're more likely to fall for his polished macho-ness, for the way he knows his way in and out of a flirtatious moment, for his grande stature that seems to have brought Greek statues to life, for the way he's capable of pulling a night long of intellectual talks and at the same time can completely go into random mood, whispering nonsense like "You're cuter with each day that goes by!" (admit it ladies, it might not make you feel comfortable, but deep inside is tugging on secret strings that we both know should be better taken care of). We'll fall for the big, flashy diamond ring he'll put on our finger with the smooth move of a cat that got her pray. There won't necessary be a knee on the floor, or a violin making us go all teary and close to fainting in anticipation, or a romantic scene whatsoever. But he will state that he wants you for an eternity and you'll see that passion in his burning eyes (he would have to put aside his celebrity-like sun-glasses for a little bit) and we'll roll with that.
We women like to fight no matter what we say, so we need a partner in crime, a man to fit the role and throw back the right words on the right tone, a man to be aware of his power and never throw at us anything else but a flower (mind the thorns if it's a rose, please). We like to hold grudges and blackmail our partners, so we need someone who's good at teasing us. We like to consider ourselves powerful and almighty, but turn into scared cats when we hear noises in the night, so we need a man with the power of hundreds to tuck is in beds and act as hugging bears until the morning when we'll kick his ass to work.
We want power and refuse to surrender, so we need to be seduced every single day by a lover with experience and eyes that can imply the most perverted fantasies through just a glance over the shoulder at a party. We need a man who'd act like a man does and make us go furiously mad (yes, those terms can go together, you know) over little things like that darn toilet seat, but when it comes to a western like confrontation, he'd know how to play wounded to death and make us take him back with hiccups and crocodile tears.
So, what do we women want? It's actually simple: a man, THE man. Kittens and tall constitution, kissing techniques that can make us tremble on two, intuition in when to play dead and warmth. We need someone with angels willing to lower themselves and play with our demons.
"We need someone who would take us as we are."
Oops! Did I kind of contradict everything I said above?!