Monday 22 July 2013

How to Love, Hard to Love

Is there a book we go by? Some sort of magical and full of past decades' wisdom brochure?
Is there a rule? A ten-steps way to finding the right path when it comes to showing your feelings to your absolute crush?
Or perhaps a Fairy Godmother to swing her wand and sprinkle her magic upon you to open your eyes and see the light in the darkness you often find yourself?
Unfortunately, that's what we see on the Internet, in sitcoms or some other types of shows on TV. The truth that no one tells you when you talk about love stories that lasted over the years is that it didn't took magic nor a special book to feed you with imaginary lines and ways to dodge awkward situations. 
They say it takes time for love to bloom.
They say it takes a single second to see that red thread you've been tied with all your life.
They say that despite the darkness and the crowd that often surrounds you out there, in the world, that special one will reveal himself to you in ways you never imagined. All you have to do is see. See the people, see their hearts, see the way the sun runs after the moon and never gets tired of chasing it. See the seconds go by when you meet someone.
I never believed in love at first sight. I strongly believe that love needs time; time to plant its seeds inside your heart, time to grow from a weak stem to a vigorous haulm that will wrap its vines all around your heart, making it beat faster than the wings of  a butterfly, time to fully bloom into the flower that will never die and always remain imprinted on your body.
Time.
But how to love when we don't have the needed time? How to love when there's barely any time left for the casuals 'Hello.' while passing on crowded corridors? How to love when we walk without seeing the sky, just the tips of our shoes that just got dirty on the way to the afternoon classes? How to love when we seek perfection in shallow places? How to love when we measure time in coins and thoughts in financial plans?
Tell me, how do you love? Do you often look at the wrist watch you always carry around? Do you even know the meaning of stopping, of breathing, of seeing? How do you love? In phrases, in sentences, broken in words, in gestures, in red lips and acid remarks, in the way you look but don't see reality, in the way you know you're broken and still go for a try?
How do you love?
It's hard to love, isn't it?
When tomorrow flies by becoming yesterday, when today is already history, it's hard to love, hope, understand and smile. When all we do needs a reason, when our thoughts are all scattered and can't really keep the track of them, when we think we understand but we don't have the needed time to ask the lingering question... it's hard to love then.
It's hard to love when loyalty is perceived as love, when kindness passes as immortal love, when silence is taken as a positive answer. It's hard to love when we've slowly become artificial humanoids under the SF name of 'Homo Sapiens Sapiens'. Have we really evolved over time? If yes, then how come our heart become proportionally smaller as the brains get bigger? If no, then what are we constantly forgetting to include in this every day equation we get to live and struggle to solve? What number did we forgot to add or subtract?
How to love when life has transformed into a huge Mathematical problem?
How to love when Chemistry died and Physics can no longer figure out the theorem of gravity?
How to love when feelings have transformed into  a well-intentioned automatic behavior?
It's hard to love when we ourselves are shallow and seek perfection.
How to love?
You tell me. For I love in words and phrases, in dreams and smiles, in rays of sun and promises. I love in kilometers.
How to love?
I tell you. For you passed by love at the intersection you left behind: give it time to settle in your heart.

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